Give yourself up to the moment...

There are so many nice sayings, quotes, philosophies about seizing the day, the hour, the moment... but sometimes it's hard to remember all these when the moments are happening and you just want to crawl into bed and ignore them.
I feel like I've spent the last few years waiting for my life to begin. I've been waiting for someone (who shall remain nameless) to come and make it all work out for me.
But that person is not coming and to tell the truth... I don't need them to anymore.
I can do this on my own and I can do it with all my love and energy.
I woke up this morning and looked out the window.

The view was so calming and simple that I immediately felt like being outside in the world. I have the support of all these wonderful friends I've met here, and all the wonderful ones I keep leaving behind, and I feel like the luckiest person in the world.
I have so many plans and so many ideas that I have to fill notebooks and notebooks with my scribbled thoughts. I haven't felt this alive since... I don't even remember.
I've always thought that if something isn't making you happy, you should stop doing it. Initially I was very good at following this philosophy, but as I grew older and the boundaries between feeling good and bad blurred, it wasn't as easy.
But now I think it's time for me to go back to this simple way of life.
I'm going to make myself happy.
Surround myself with people who love me and make me smile.
It's going to be a good day today.